Because I’m too cheap to pay $75 for an official jersey

I’ve been watching the World Cup matches, and was inspired by T’s blogging of his Team USA swag to wear my support of Messrs Donovan, Howard, Altidore et al. But being too cheap to pay $75 for an official World Cup jersey, I headed to the local thrift store and procured:

1) Soccer Ball – plush stuffed toy – $0.99
2) Stars and Stripes musical necktie – $0.99
3) Star-shaped flag pin – $0.25

4) A woman’s sleeveless top with a flag motif – $.099
5) A men’s USA soccer jersey-all cotton. From the looks of it, from 1994! – $0.99 – This was for Joe.

On an old straw hat I had lying around that was too big for me, I sewed on the soccer ball, and safety pinned the tie around the brim, and pinned on the flag. I removed the tinny Star Spangled Banner sound system from the tie – I find those things annoying.

On Saturday, I wore it to the USA vs. England free viewing party at AT&T Park. Most people smiled when they saw my hat – 2 people asked to take my picture! Little kids in their parents’ arms kept wanting squeeze the ball. Drunken punks kept wanting to kick the ball. “Oh no, mi cabeza!” Total expenditure for hat :$2.23.

There was another guy at the game who had a similar DIY philosophy — he had hand lettered his T-shirt. The back of his shirt said “US > UK” (OK, not technically correct for the game, but right on in spirit!)
The front had:

Steak and Potatoes > Bangers and Mash
Steve Carrell > Ricky Gervais
Jack Bauer > James Bond
Beach Boys > Beatles
Lady Gaga > Lady Di
New York > London
Billy Joel > Elton John
Bush > Blair
Bars > Pubs
SNL > Monty Python
Exxon > BP
Baseball > Cricket
Budweiser > Newcastle
American Dentists > British Dentists
Right side of the road > Left side of the road

There were some structural problems with the beta version of my hat even with the hat strings tied around my chin – the ball was very top heavy, and because the hat crown was too big and too loose for my head, the hat kept slipping. So I got home and reinforced it with a plastic yogurt lid, and some elastic – it makes a little complicate to put on, but now it’s stable enough when I tie the strings under my chin. Aesthetics were improved by sewing on the tie around the full crown of the hat.

I guess if I wear it to a bar to watch the games, I should pick a seat by the wall, so I don’t block people’s view!


4 thoughts on “Because I’m too cheap to pay $75 for an official jersey

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